Saturday, April 12, 2008

When the cat’s away it seems the mice are reluctant to score.

Glenurquhart 2 Lochcarron 1
Glenurquhart 0 Caberfeidh

After the slowest of starts to the season, the Wing Centre has managed to be firth of the Glen long enough to miss two games in a row-one a fine win at home to Lochcarron in the MacTavish Cup and a not so fine draw with Caberfeidh also at home . So what can you make of the Glen? At least as far as this season goes so far they have not been beaten .
However the real verdict must be that the Wing Centre is unsure really at this stage and somewhat concerned about this weekend’s trip to Skye which is why this piece has not been posted in time for the youngsters to read it and feel that the Wing Centre is suffering from a crisis of confidence..
Still it was nice to defeat the Caranachs in the Cup and this weekend should be a bonus in that it will tell us a little about the nature of the Sgiathanachs. The hope is that with their football season started the few of them that see a future playing pub football in the North reserve league, will be playing the round ball game to try to impress coaches who have come over to see the natives disport themselves on the reservation.
The Wing Centre has an instinctive distaste for the imperialist tendencies of football, especially now that it seems to have been given the approval of the Almighty in the Glen but sometimes it is an ill wind. The hope lingers that half the Skye squad will choose the round ball this weekend -though most probably Davie MacVicar has converted the whole top end of the island to the true faith with his evangelical fervour for the stick game.
Back to the Caranachs. The Wing Centre was in the car driving through the snow and speaking to Mr Reid about the game. Mr Reid had just paid the referee an inordinate amount of the Lotto money for coming north from Argyll to officiate- whatever happened to Donnie Fraser from Inverness- and was clearly in no mood to go into fine detail on the match.
“Two goals from Lewis Maclennan “
“That it”
“When did he get them?”
“During the game- when do you think?”
“Astie will want the times.”
There was a great deal of sighing . The Wing Centre had to remind Mr Reid that he possessed a photograph of Mr Reid as a young nipper in the 1958 school Macpherson Cup team ,which ,if published would cause his two sons and most probably his good lady to laugh and laugh and laugh.
“35 minutes and 82 minutes”
“Their goal?”
More huffing and puffing
“Darren Coyle 44”
“So it was a close game and we nicked it at the end . What were Lewis’s goals like?”
The phone went dead. Mr Reid was obviously in no mood to elaborate.
Hendo wasn’t much better.
“What were Lewis ‘s goals like?”
“Good goals. That’s all Lewis scores”
So that was it-no more to say or describe.
As for Lochcarron , for all the heroes were concerned they might have spent the day rounding up sheep or painting the boats on the loch for all the attention their efforts attracted.
On return to Drum the question was asked about the Caranachs.
“How did Alan Mackenzie play at full back?”
“OK but Neale Reid gave him a hard game ”
“But it’s the great Alan Mackenzie. The best full back in the whole world apart from the eight in the Premier League that is”
“He was OK”
“What about Kenny Ross?”
“Ok -but he’s not as hard to play against as his father”
The Wing Centre was taken aback by this because he did not think the speaker had ever played against Kenny though he had clashed camans with Ronnie often enough.
Asking about the Cabers game caused more problems. A wall of silence descended.
“What happened?” seemed a reasonable request at the time.
It obviously wasn’t.
“Typical Cabers game. A wet day. Freezing cold. The park was heavy-just couldn’t score. You know Cabers-hard at the back. Denzil and the rest of them. Macgregor as well.” said Mr Reid
“What’s wrong with that?” asked the Wing Centre
“Nothing, “ said Mr Reid.
“So how many saves did Archie the Goalie have to make”
The Wing Centre paused for dramatic effect.
“But they never threatened us either” concluded Mr Reid.
The picture was becoming clearer : in the end the press release from the politburo stated that the Glen had 70% of the play but the other relevant fact was that Archie the Goalie made no saves. Then again neither did Stuart the Goalie
The Wing Centre was about to phone Davie MacMaster to get the other side of the story but in the end decided not to bother. If Stuart the Goalie had no saves to make then what was the point of having Davie MacMaster trying to beat down the Glen figure of possession claimed from 70% to perhaps 69%. Waste of time.
It was Astie at Alton Towers on Tuesday who really forced the Wing Centre to think on his feet.
“No one phoned in the result last week“, he said accusingly “but I got it in the end”
“Glad you did but that would have been Mr Reid and from his perspective it would have been right not to phone.”
“What do you mean ?“ said Astie.
“Well there were no goals , so Mr Reid would have thought there was no point in phoning in because the default position on your computer would have been a 0-0 draw. What was the point of contacting you when you already knew the result.?”
Astie put the phone down - and the Wing Centre notes that the Glen were not awarded the prize for Team of the Month.
As for the snap at the top, the Wing Centre thought it might be a good idea to remind the lads what it feels like when you don’t score. No? Perhaps not such a good idea after all. Then score!!

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